and so the pendulum swings

someone apologized to me on sunday.
the combination of humility, apologies, and forgiveness is just stellar.  and healing.  for all parties involved.
i am happy and thankful for the growth through this.
and i am happy to be coming out of this cloud that has lasted for like, oh.......seven months.  but c'est la vie.  and i'm ok with that.  i have to be.  otherwise i would be in misery.
you have to let yourself grow and be taught.  submission and obedience to that can have a positive impact on those around you who witness what you're going through.  it can have a negative impact, too.  it's our choice.
i am being sanctified.
i am thankful.

mother's day was so lovely.  eric made a weekend out of it.  he and the kids celebrated me, i celebrated the kids.
we ate dinner at my favorite restaurant, azul.
we ate breakfast at my favorite diner, chick-a-dee's.
we paid the doc a visit (julian's been sick).
we attempted to feed ducks early sunday morning (it was a bit brisk that morn').
we ate donuts.
we drank hot lattes.
we were mall rats.
we all got gifts.
we loved up on kitties at the animal shelter.
we hit up some thrift sales.
we went to church.
we smelled hydrangea flowers.
we listened to records.
we read sweet cards.
we didn't fight.
hallelujah!

"turtie" has been julian's stuffed-animal-of-choice lately.
molly added to her kitty collection.  she hit the jackpot at a thrift sale we went to.  that is just a small fraction of her kitties.

azul's.

out of control.
i love it.

half moon lake.

i froze my little aqua toes off.

look at that smile.  she is in heaven.
she loooooved the black kittens and was completely partial to them.  i can't imagine why.

total angel right here.
that smile!

sleeping beauty babe.

i made dark brown sugar coconut oil cookies.

a boy, a scooter, and a pair of pliers.

this photo:

.......inspired by
this book:

how was your mother's day?

mom.

circa july 1989

that's me, my mom, and my sister.

i was five.

.......and my kiddies and me.

happy mother's day, everyone!

some things

gumball glory.

this is my mother's day present.  a pink turntable to play my beatles records on!

julian was asking us for days if we could go to the pet store.  he wanted to see the "turties" most of all.  so we took him yesterday to two that are in town and then treated ourselves to chipotle!

julian has been sick on and off for literally two months.  when i take him to the doc they think it's just virus after virus after virus.  so when we went to targs to get him some meds, he got to pick out a toy to cheer him up!  he chose that batman to partner with the captain america he already had.  so he's been palin' around with these guys all day long.

eric started his master's program last week.  it's been.......a hard adjustment.  no matter the precautions we took and preparing ourselves for success, it's been straining nonetheless.

i haven't polished my finger nails or toe nails in months.  this is the new hue i chose for them:

&

mint and turquoise.  perfect!

i'm hopelessly obsessed with cookbooks.  i blame my dad.

happy mail!  the new anthro catalog.......

molly has been playing with her calico critters nonstop all week.  i happen to not mind at all because i might like them more than she does.  they're just so quality and novel!!

who in the world doesn't like orla's designs for method?  look at this new one for spring:

ca-yooooooot!!

bits of beauty



 

1.  julian was playing photographer and snapped this one of molly and me cuddling.
2.  the kids were having a blast playing with this curtain in the dining room.  eric and i were inspired, so we joined them and laughed our heads off.
3.  police man julian.  that smirk on his face is hilarious.
4.  my little babe took it upon herself to lay on the porch swing while i was playing a beatles record on my new record player.  such a little beatnik. 
6.  zen julian.  i looked in the rear-view mirror and saw this when we were in a drive-thru.  what a free bird.  i mean, he even took his shoes off.

splendid isolation

ant's eye view
phoenix park
eau claire, wi

someone told me a few weeks ago that my family and i live an isolated lifestyle. 
that really hurt my feelings a lot.  and that opinion was spoken after his other half gave me unwelcome advice about how when their kids were little she had to decide to go to work because of how they were driving her completely nuts.  basically encouraging me to do the same.  i couldn't even believe it. 

i get it.  i relate some days.  i don't think, though, that God puts anyone on a parenting journey for complete ease.  raising kids is very challenging.  it's supposed to be.  it's supposed to stretch us and grow our character, as we put our children through the same thing so their own character can grow and flourish. 

i didn't decide to exclusively stay home with my kids because i thought it would be easy.  i didn't decide to homeschool because i thought it would be easy.  i did it because i believe without a single doubt that it's the right thing to do.  it doesn't come natural to me.  i think that will come as a surprise to a lot of people.  i'm not doing this because it is my gift or because it's a built-in character trait of mine.  no, not at all.  i am naturally selfish.  i want to serve myself.  i do it because it's the right thing to do.  and, as you always hear, doing the right thing usually means doing the hardest thing among a slew of options. 

don't get me wrong, i do enjoy what i do.  most days.  i really would not have it any other way.  i consider it a tremendous, monumental blessing that i get to spend as much time with my family as i do.  i consider it a complete answer to prayer that eric works from home.  God has truly truly blessed us in that we can live out this lifestlye.  because of this faithful decision, He has allowed me to reap blessings from this experience.  because He knows our hearts.  He knew that this is what i really wanted.  He knew how much i love quantity time with my family.  for serving others day in and day out, i have been blessed.  and when i say i'm blessed, i don't mean i have a lot of stuff and i was blessed that way.  i don't have a gigantic house on a cul-de-sac (nor do i want one), i don't have the newest gadgets, i don't take grand vacations every single year.  i consider all of that a blessing.  because, as i just recently learned and believe: 

everything going well is not necessarliy a sign of God's blessing in one's life.  in fact, it can signify a lack of God's hand on their lives.

so to label me "isolated" is just pompus, foolish, and, well, worldly.  what i do today would have been the 'norm' a hundred years ago.  people then didn't even have the ability to see others whenever they wanted to.  most men were farmers and they recruited their children to do the same.  did that mean they were isoslated?  no, of course not!  that would just be silly. 

and another thing, it's not ok at all to say things that can be potentially hurtful and justify it by saying you're teaching, correcting, or rebuking.  because you're supposed to do those three things with great patience and careful instruction. 

a couple years ago i was very excited in thinking that my lifestyle and decisions maybe would inspire others to do the same.  now, a couple years into it, i see that instead it's an opportunity for others to justify to me why they don't.  and it's very very discouraging.

so happy together

lately i've been depressed.  people glorify that word and throw it around so much that it's become synonymous with being in a brief funk or being sad for a bit.
but i've been very sad and on the verge of crying at any given moment.
which is probably why i haven't been posting.......too sad.
but then i realized that taking pictures and editing them makes me happy.  and it's therapeutic.
so i spent some time doing just that.
here's what i came up with:
the snow finally completely melted away and the kids have been scooting like crazy.
snow completely melted away = happiness.

molly changes clothes at least 23 times per day.  this is her tap dance dress from last year's recital complete with aqua leggings adorned with hot pink cats.  this makes me happy.

and baths make her happy.

and so do zebras and bubble gum.

and baking perks up all of us.

as do fresh red strawberries.

compliments on my baking also make me happy.  eric told me these lemon raspberry thumbprints are his #1 favorite cookie.  woohoo!

pairing a hot pink bathing suit with pink and purple striped knee-socks makes molly happy.  and myself.  i can't look at her and NOT giggle to myself.

going to molly's dance class as a family makes me happy.  watching this boy read to himself makes me very very happy.  and the illustrations in that book he's reading make me happy, too; they are so great!

new cookbooks and this successful recipe for oatmeal cookie pancakes make me happy and totally bless me (and my family!).

care-packages from shelb make all of us crazy happy!!

art supplies and painting on the warm porch always always makes me smile with happiness.

going for a walk with my three loves, and white picket fences both make me happy.

going to the library with eric and the kids to pick out teaching materials makes me happy.

this girl in red and polka dots makes me smile and my heart swell with happiness.

hopscotch,

hello kitty, hearts, and hot pink hail happiness.

shadows, sunlight, silhouettes, and snacks sap sadness.

briefly having the house to myself is very very awesome, and, needless to say, makes me happy!

this book makes me happy.
LOVE.  IT.  SO.  MUCH.

playgrounds sans snow make everybody happy.

free sbux hookup from a sweet friend makes eric and i incredibly happy.
: D

so do sun rays.

a new bird feeder makes a certain boy very happy.......

sleeping in apparently makes molly and eric happy.

phoenix park, picnics,

pie,

pretty princesses,

and playtime perk our pulses.

bridge/river walks,

random toys,

daddy,

freedom,

and these two cute kids bless me.

drawing yields happiness, too.

going to the playground, making friends, and getting an actual suntan makes me very happy!

new dance gear from shelb could not possibly make molly happier.

and - finally getting to dance in the pink room makes her sooooooo happy!!!  .......she's been waiting for that all year long.

and, what would a happy list be without the mall of america and nickelodeon universe??

and, last but not least, i heard this song on the way back from the cities and made eric write down the artist.  and then i downloaded it when i got home.  this is one of my favorite songs i've heard in a looooooong time.  simply timeless.